My Top 5 SUCKS!

[Soul]

Ok the idea of this is pretty damn simple all you have to do is diss your top 5 artists. I say top 5 though you can to a couple more than that if you guys want though no more than 10 if possible. Ok this is not a thread for you to make fun of someone elses music taste ok.

Rush - My god! Aren't you guys like 80 by now? Geddy you sound like a woman so shut the fuck up and make me a sandwich. And what the hell stop fucking changing your genre every coulple of fucking years I mean cmon at one point you were using a SYNTHESIZER.

Alexisonfire - Do you guys honestly doubt your singers so much that you need 3 of them. And what the fuck is up with the damn screaming. Are you trying to make my ears bleed?

KRS-One - You must be fucking joking RAP! Isnt it already an established fact that anyone that listens to rap is a flaming homosexual? I wont even say anything else since I dont need to explain myself here.

Streetlight Manifesto - Why the hell do you use fucking band instruments? Were you so damn geeky in high school that instead of taking guitar classes like the cool people you decided oh i'll just join band instead.

Radiohead - Is it just me or do all of your fucking songs have a depressing tone? Thats probably because of fucking Thom Yorke. But honestly it gets really fucking old really fucking quickly.


That was alot harder than I thought it would be to do. Probably why their my top 5 I suppose.

Ok BEGIN!

[Far]

Ok this is not a thread for you to make fun of someone elses music taste ok.

This is key.

[Triple J]

Blue October: Wow that's so amazing that you can "lay your heart out on stage." I mean my god I want to listen to some music not a ballad about how you lost your mom or wife or whoever the hell it was. And seriously, a violin player?

Hellogoodbye: You guys are more busy posting your faggy pictures up on your myspace more then you actually play your music. I still have yet to find one, ONE song that Isn't a song about love by you guys.

Against Me!: Okay I get that you're "punk rock." But still you should try getting a lyricist that doesn't completely suck cock. I mean what's up with the song "white people for peace?" Does the title have anything to do with the song at all. Are you trying to pull off a Panic! at the Disco/Fall Out Boy kind of thing here?

The Killers: "When You were Young" is a decent enough song but when you put a song on Guitar Hero make sure it has a least some kind of memorable guitar section.

Family Force 5 : You have such a lack of diversity in your songs I always end up running my "Cadillac Phunque" into my "Whatcha Gonna Do With It?"

[Soul]

No there isnt the one in the music hall is to talk about your top 5. Here you have to DISS your own top 5.

[Far]

There isn't and who cares.:indiff:

[haza]

Cannibal Corpse You are not a band!!! You do not make music!!!! What is your problem?!?!? why do you want to kill people in the most disgusting ways when you go to church every sunday!!!!!! And Bass solo's?? What the hell are bass solo's!!?? At least make em good!!!!!!

The Beautiful South ARe you actually trying to kill people with your music!! Why do u even make music that would make people rather stick a knife in their own throat then listen to it!!

thats all i could think of for now....i might edit this if i think of some more

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[The Super Hannah]

Streetlight Manifesto is the only one I like in your top 5.

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[xJesusx]

Without too much thinking,
Operation Ivy- What the fuck? Could the sound quality be any worse? The longest song is only like 2:30 minutes, could you not do any better than that short ska-punk? no wonder why you guys only lasted 2 years. And how original, doing an EP of Ramones covers. Bravo.
NOFX Mike, you sound like a whiny bitch on vocals. I sound more like a man than you do(said by a 16 year old, 95 pound female with an obnoxiously high pitched voice). And you are porbably one of the most talent-less singers I have heard in quite a while. Enough said.
Children of Bodom You guys look like women, I almost thought Laiho WAS a woman at first glance. What the fuck is with the soon-to-be-released albums song titles? Bloodrunk? Tie my Rope? Could you have put any less effort into this? I can't honestly be expected to pay money for that, surely. Maybe you should concentrate on making good music a little more and drop all the booze.

All I can think of right now are those three. But come on guys, this is a cool idea, keep it going!

[Tweek]

bmump because it's a decent idea.

Bloc Party
They couldn't turn a profit from generic post-punk revival shit after the fad died out, so they took some more ideas from NME and turned dance punk but were too retarded to do that right.

Test Icicles
Retarded scene shit. They dressed like indie fags and played a ridiculous mix of electronic hardcore metal with enough screaming, skinny jeans and bangs piled in to win over the stupid hipsters. They were too shit to even get a drummer to play with them.

Beastie Boys
A trio of Jews who couldn't play their instruments decided to cash in on the growing hip hop scene, and so the Beastie Boys were born. After it turned out that black people didn't like them stealing run-DMC's beats and yelling stupid frat boy party anthems over the top, they went to LA (abandoning their 'beloved' NYC) to have some producers whip up a few albums of random you know what fuck this the Beastie Boys are fucking awesome.

Reagan Youth
Stupid name with no relevance outside the eighties context. They sucked for years and then they broke up because despite constant touring, nobody really liked them.

Blur
Realised the shoegaze trend was fading so they hopped onto the backs of Oasis and played bad Britpop. Nobody cared until they broke the mould and released 'Song 2', which was subsequently declared annoying as fuck by millions. And then nobody cared again.

I think I did it wrong, I basically just twisted the truth/blatantly lied to make the bands sound bad because I don't really have any big criticisms.

[Ocellatus]

1: Frank Zappa
No wonder this hairy old dude wasn't popular, his crap was too weird for regular people. The only real appeal comes from douche-bags that listen to Frank beacuse they think it makes them seem smart. Ship Arrving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch is one of the worst albums I've ever owned.

2: Opeth
We've got a Swedish girlie-man singing about how he's so upset about stuff, and to make matters worse, he listens to Porcupine Tree and is actually proud of it. That crap is lame, and youcan hear the lameification effecting Opeth.

3: Mr. Bungle
The only reason Mr Bungle was able to make any albums was due to the success of Faith No More. While they lack underground credibility due to this, it's still a pain in the dick to find their stuff.

4: Atheist
Their vocalist has a girls name, and he got Scott Weiland got the job in Velvet Revolver over him.

5: Mastodon
Hillbilly Prog-Metal for hipsters.
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