Cock Stuck in Dog's Arse

[Quadros]

Ok I won't bore you with the details but my cock's in my dog's arse and i can't get it out. He looks like he's in serious pain and my girlfriend's due back any minute.

Anyone know how to get a dog off your cock quickly???

[Quadros]

Guys seriously I'm not kidding around, help would be awesome.

[Slutty McBangerton]

If you rub the dogs genitals in a clock-wise motion, it causes a relaxation in the abdominal muscles. This should cause him to release his bowels, as well as your cock. :science:

[Quadros]

MY DOG HAS NO GENITALS HE WAS NEUTERED AT BIRTH.

OH SHIT HER CAR JUST PULLED UP ON THE DRIVE.

FUCK FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

FOR FUCKS SAKE SOMEONE HELP ME I'M BEGGING YOU!

[Quadros]

Well thanks a lot guys, I'm single now.

Fucking cocksuckers.

(Actual thanks Slutty for trying :frown:)

[Slutty McBangerton]

They don't remove the genitals entirely. Unless your dog is female. In that case, you have to do something entirely different.

[Tweek]

Make your dog eat chilli.

[Pieman]

Hide near the door and knock her out. That should buy you some time. Now grab a knife and cut yourself out. Rape your girlfriend and mess her up abit. Break some windows and injure yourself.

A black guy broke in, and killed her dog. You tried to stop him but he (Injury here)'d you. He then raped her.

Damn, too late.

[Quadros]

It's my dog, I'm not killing him. Yep, she took one look at us, said 'oh, fuck you then', went upstairs, came back ten minutes later with a sutcase and drove off.

The dog's still on my cock.

Cooking chilli with a dog on your cock is very difficult.

[Slutty McBangerton]

Ok. As a LAST resort, you have to put your feet behind your head.. this position is very important. Then, while holding that position, lift your dogs tail while sticking your finger into his anus and use that finger to coax your cock out. Your legs HAVE to be behind your head or this won't work. Should this fail, go into your freezer for a while, or jump into a cold pool.

[Pieman]

At least you have a stable platform to hold things on :lol:

Wait, shit I'm sorry dude. It must be a tough enough time right now. With your girlfriend leaving you and shit.

Also, was the dog a good lay? Must be tight to be clamped on like that.

[Cmd Asshat]

What sort of dog is it?

This is a very delicate procedure

[Zoltan]

For a simple solution to this unnerving problem:
Since you obviously have no trouble accessing the internet in your condition, I recommend finding as many pictures of Rosie O'Donnel as you can, putting them all over your screen in multiple windows. Once your erection has been completely killed, you should have no trouble extracting yourself from your canine.
Cheers!

[MangaFreak]

For a simple solution to this unnerving problem:
Since you obviously have no trouble accessing the internet in your condition, I recommend finding as many pictures of Rosie O'Donnel as you can, putting them all over your screen in multiple windows. Once your erection has been completely killed, you should have no trouble extracting yourself from your canine.
Cheers!

Oh my god Zoltan, that just made my fucking day. I laughed so hard at that.
But seriously, is this thread for real? Haha.

[Chips]

Oh my god Zoltan, that just made my fucking day. I laughed so hard at that.
But seriously, is this thread for real? Haha.

No, its just another way for Quadros to threadshit in another part of the forum.

[Miss Freeze]

Do you have any vaseline handy?

[CrumPoker]

Isn't it weird he has time to post all this with a dog attached to his dick.
Anyone?

[Miss Freeze]

It's qaudros, the internet is the most important thing to him.

[Toilet Rancor]

No, it's not real unless he has some kind of fucked up dick jewelry snagged on the dog's intestines.


also, if it WAS real, I doubt someone who fucks his male dog in the ass would be turned off by anyone human. even rosie.

[natalie137]

Please keep this forum for serious threads only.