I killed my girlfriend

[SealPunter]

I am assuming this has never happened to any of you...
The title says it all.


She was in a car with one of her friends and they got into an accident. The weren't drunk, high, or in any way under any influence.



I don't know what to do with anything anymore.
No matter which way I look at it I can't help to think it was my fault.

I spent the past 7 hours sitting outside of her house on some rock, no tears at all. I have no fucking idea.

All I can muster to say intelligibly would be to cherish every moment of it, because no matter how certain you are shit like this won't happen to you... It could.

[timbot]

That's really tough shit to deal with. I've never been through anything like that.
Guess I don't have anything much to say about it except that I feel or you in the limited way that I can.

[Cristo]

I would advise you to close this topic unless you want to see worse treatment than Fabz or The Fetus.

Also, my condolences.

[Christoffason]

Why did you think Explosm would help? I'm not sure whether to believe you. If she did, then that's unfortunate, I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

[Ox]

There's not really anything to discuss here. Sucks that your girlfriend died, I guess... but all that's going to happen is that people will say "sorry" or "lol ur gf died".

[stfu]

lmao that sucks.

edit: oh, and condolences.

[Pelican Man]

In before necrophilia jokes.

If you're not in a good state due to this, I seriously recommend closing this thread, as no doubt some of the replies will be 'hilarious', and will probably upset you. Just a heads up.

Oh, and sorry to hear about it.

[Ercoledi]

I hope you have a much better support group than Explosm.net. While we can all express our condolences, there's not much else that we can do. Close this thread and turn to your family and friends, or take it to PMs or IMs.

If it helps, know that under all the assholery, I'm sure we're decent people and we do send our sympathy during this difficult time.

[Cristo]

Wait, how can you think it's your fault?

You weren't even in the car were you?

I'm assuming you didn't force her to go driving, and I'm also assuming that there weren't like 10 of you guys at a party and you had to flip a coin to see who went by car and who went by bus.

[SealPunter]

The only reason I opened this thread (started whatever...) was because I knew how you would treat me.


And I knew it would make me laugh.


But if it is just annoying I can close it.

[Hickabod]

This happened to a friend of mine, she never really got over him, hope you're ok Seal-Buddy.

[Pelican Man]

Well then you're a sadistic fuck.

[Cristo]

Wouldn't that correct term be masochistic? Since he's inflicting it on himself.

[Phrozt]

If you need to tell your story just to get it out, there's always grouphug.us

That being said, good luck in your journey through the stages of death.

[Haggis McSpud]

That happened to my cousin, same situation, driving completely sober and not under the influence of drugs, just a really horrible accident.
I'm not trying to add my sob story to this thread, but my cousin was like a brother to me, so I know how you feel, and can offer my complete sympathies to you at this time.

[Pelican Man]

Wouldn't that correct term be masochistic? Since he's inflicting it on himself.

Is it really THAT important?

[Ox]

Oh well, in that case let the flaming begin.

At least if they were drunk or high they'd have had an excuse and gone out in style... instead of just being shit at driving.

[Ercoledi]

Holy shit, she wasn't an Obama voter, was she?! :wail:

[Tyler_Legrand]

If you can't laugh at yourself then you can't laugh at all!

[Cristo]

Is it really THAT important?

There's nothing else going on in this topic.

[CasinoCloudz]

The only reason I opened this thread (started whatever...) was because I knew how you would treat me.


And I knew it would make me laugh.


But if it is just annoying I can close it.

So basically you opened a thread about your girlfriend dying so people would make fun of you?

Thats fucked up

[CasinoCloudz]

.

[Casalen]

You totally owned Fetus with this thread. Well done.

[Pelican Man]

There's nothing else going on in this topic.

That sounds like a big fat 'no' to me.

[Haggis McSpud]

So basically you opened a thread about your girlfriend dying so people would make fun of you?

Thats fucked up

He is an Explosmer. What better way to cheer him up than making horrible jokes about his dead girlfriend?

[Cristo]

That sounds like a big fat 'no' to me.

Well, fine whatever.

But you were still wrong, sadochism implies that he was inflicting the pain on others.

SO FUCK YOU.

[Haggis McSpud]

Well, fine whatever.

But you were still wrong, sadochism implies that he was inflicting the pain on others.

SO FUCK YOU.

My, Cristo, you're certainly in an argumentative mood today.

[Cristo]

Haha it's just a bit of friendly banter.

[Haggis McSpud]

Yeah, I got that from the "FUCK YOU" part. :lol:

[Cristo]

My this thread certainly is interesting.

How was school today?

[MSB]

I'm not going to make a joke. I'm just going to say I'm sorry, and I hope you're okay.

[Niki]

You totally owned Fetus with this thread. Well done.

That is totally what I thought at first.
That sucks though.

[Ercoledi]

C'mon, guys. Making jokes at his expense is the absolute least we could do.

[Crabstick]

I'm honestly shocked that you had a girlfriend to begin with.

[Phrozt]

Holy shit, she wasn't an Obama voter, was she?! :wail:

Of course she was. That's probably why god (in the shape of a car) killed her!

You totally owned Fetus with this thread. Well done.

Fetus's thread is a fake. As I posted in there, the last time I heard such a sappy bullshit story was when my girlfriend left the Lifetime channel on.

[HappyPalooza]

It was all your fault.

[Assassin]

I cut the brakes

[Mirrorman]

Whoa.Whoa.Whoa. Whats with all the death shit going on here lately? Is this some halloween thing for you american people?

[Kevosk]

Well, fine whatever.

But you were still wrong, sadochism implies that he was inflicting the pain on others.

SO FUCK YOU.

The term is actually sadism, buttface :facts:

Also, maybe if your girlfriend was better at driving she'd still be with us, eh? Survival of the fittest!

[Haggis McSpud]

Whoa.Whoa.Whoa. Whats with all the death shit going on here lately? Is this some halloween thing for you american people?

I blame Assassin. The clues in the name!

[Niki]

Fetus's thread is a fake. As I posted in there, the last time I heard such a sappy bullshit story was when my girlfriend left the Lifetime channel on.

No it's not. It's been going on for a long time before he made that thread.

[HappyPalooza]

I blame Assassin. The clues in the name!

I cut the brakes

[Spiffy13]

Dude, that really really sucks, but like other people said, there's not really much we can do other than say "sorry" or "my condolences". I don't even know what I would do if my girlfriend, or anyone close to me for that matter, died. Hope you feel better soon.

[abbey]

:frown:

[Mirrorman]

Soo. Shoving your high-class girlfriend under our noses huh? Atleast you have someone to grieve:wail: .

[Chrisso]

Well, at least I made sure she lost her virginity before she died.

Something you didn't have the guts to do, you fag.








rofl

[Cristo]

Hahahaha.

Show her family this thread ^_^

[Antisaint]

Sucks unless the car exploded.

Also karma's a bitch, eh?

[Propaganda]

I spent the past 7 hours sitting outside of her house on some rock, no tears at all. I have no fucking idea.
Sit on that rock and smoke some rock. It'll all make sense.

[The Fetus]

Fetus's thread is a fake. As I posted in there, the last time I heard such a sappy bullshit story was when my girlfriend left the Lifetime channel on.

Yeah, I'd actually bust my ass to make a thread to fool people on the internet that I don't know or care about to write a story that was hard to believe anyway. :jerk:

By the way, you have my condolences. That sounds incredibly depressing. It seems to put me in a foolish position for me to bitch about my girlfriend dying in a decade or so when yours died just so suddenly and recently. And I just can't make a joke about that. My thread wasn't a lie, and I don't think this one is, but people will toss jokes up about this. I hope you and her family can get through a tragedy such as this.

[Rob]

Whoa did it just get really edgy in here?

[Souldrinker]

Did you take the opportunity to get one last crack at her?

I certainly hope so.

[Mirrorman]

She probably did it because you're lousy at sex.

[Infammo]

I'm sure she really did die. Only a complete ass would make a thread about a false death just so they could get attention.

Anyway it sucks about your girlfriend. But if you've ever wanted to be a super hero you've now got a pretty decent origin story.

[Mirrorman]

Max Payne 2 amirite?

[Ox]

I'm sure she really did die. Only a complete ass would make a thread about a false death just so they could get attention.

Anyway it sucks about your girlfriend. But if you've ever wanted to be a super hero you've now got a pretty decent origin story.

Especially if the rock was radioactive!

[Phrozt]

Yeah, I'd actually bust my ass to make a thread to fool people on the internet that I don't know or care about to write a story that was hard to believe anyway. :jerk:

People do that on explosm all the time. I mean, it's a place where a lot of creative people come to toss out bits of their skill to a sounding board of like minded people and/or act like jackasses and/or have an uncanny ability to laugh at the most inappropriate things, a.k.a. the entire collection of C&H (also, this very thread).

This isn't exactly the best community to look for sympathy. Not saying that this community *can't* express those feelings, but it's generally the opposite.

[GCBC]

This happened to a friend of mine, she never really got over him, hope you're ok Seal-Buddy.

7gV3g9LCvPc

[OmfLobster?]

Pah, that sucks. I don't even want to know what I would think if my EX died.

Just go with the ebb and flow of everyday life, and something good will happen to you. Like maybe you'll meet someone with nice boobies! Boobs rock!

[CasinoCloudz]

She will be remembered for her skills in the sac.

[Raxo]

Post a picture of her or I'll assume you're lying.

[Phrozt]

Post a picture of her or I'll assume you're lying.

Preferably pre mortem.

[Raxo]

Either way works.

[the2na]

Well, better luck next time. Better start sleeping around to get over it the fastest.

[Lag]

A simple "it's not you, it's me" would have sufficed.

[Iiro]

Some of you guys are complete assholes..

Why would you think it was your fault, seal?
You should try and talk to your family or close friends about it. Don't touch alcohol.

[Phrozt]

Some of you guys are complete assholes..

Actually, we're doing what seal wants. If you read the thread, you'll see that the reason he created this thread was to get some laughs out of it to try to help him cope, so that's what we're doing.

[SealPunter]

I didn't start this thread...

I don't even have a fucking girlfriend... WHAT THE TITS?!?!

[SODA]

I didn't start this thread...

I don't even have a fucking girlfriend... WHAT THE TITS?!?!

:blanky:

[Haggis McSpud]

I didn't start this thread...

I don't even have a fucking girlfriend... WHAT THE TITS?!?!

Wait, so you don't have a dead girlfriend?

[HappyPalooza]

So you didn't sit on a rock for seven hours?

[BreakTheWalls]

Oh god this is gonna be gold.

Please say you have a mischievous younger brother who shares the PC with you.

[Assassin]

I didn't start this thread...

I don't even have a fucking girlfriend... WHAT THE TITS?!?!
Denial -the second phase

[Raxo]

SO you're not gonna post pics?

awwwwww

[Lag]

Denial -the second phase

That's the first, dumb dumb.

Althought this guy can't even get his phases straight, let alone his dead girlfriend.

[Vir]

In before necrophilia jokes.



"In" what pelicanman?

I'd make sure your Girlfriend is properly buried, before more people can get IN :jerk:

[Assassin]

"In" what pelicanman?

I'd make sure your Girlfriend is properly buried, before more people can get IN :jerk:
ahahahaha oh man you're such a card

[Cristo]

Only a complete ass would make a thread about a false death just so they could get attention.


then

I didn't start this thread...

I don't even have a fucking girlfriend... WHAT THE TITS?!?!

What a cunt. I REALLY hate using that word, so that shows how vile you are.

[Phrozt]

What a cunt. I REALLY hate using that word, so that shows how vile you are.

I LOVE using cunts.

[Benjaman]

Was your girlfriend driving? I hope not, I've been trying to train my dog to drive for years now and it still can't.

[BreakTheWalls]

Bit late to the party Benjaman. This thread has morphed into a whole new beast since the inaugural post.

We've yet to see SealPunter post since the bombshell that he didn't do it. I still place money on his younger brother being responsible.

[Matterialize]

AN ETHIOPIAN CHILD DIES EVERY THREE SECONDS, YOU'RE ALL TERRIBLE PEOPLE

[SealPunter]

I have a brother who uses this computer, but I didn't think he was this smart...

USER WAS PERMABANNED FOR THIS POST. (http://forums.explosm.net/eventlog.php)
Reason: Keep better tabs on your next account.

[Cristo]

:hmm: To belive or not to believe.

[BreakTheWalls]

I have a brother who uses this computer, but I didn't think he was this smart...

I knew it.

I'd suggest User Accounts and passwords from this point on, if you want to keep any shred of credibility you have left.

[Niki]

I KNEW you didn't have a girlfriend!

[SealPunter]

I knew it.

I'd suggest User Accounts and passwords from this point on, if you want to keep any shred of credibility you have left.

:wail:
I KNEW you didn't have a girlfriend!


:wail:

[HappyPalooza]

We should ban him just to be safe.

[CasinoCloudz]

I agree with happypalooza

Or the younger brother must die for hurting SealPunters already startling reputation.

[javaD]

Well my friend, I'm sorry for your loss, but don't be a whiny bitch about it k? I'm not trying to be mean I'm just trying to make you feel better, and instead of turning into a whiny bitch you can move on...and get some pussy in the future.

[Haggis McSpud]

Well my friend, I'm sorry for your loss, but don't be a whiny bitch about it k? I'm not trying to be mean I'm just trying to make you feel better, and instead of turning into a whiny bitch you can move on...and get some pussy in the future.

Well done for not reading the latest thread update:lol:

[Shagg]

lol say hi to ur gf in PERMAHELL

[Niki]

Who was it?

[BreakTheWalls]

Wait, wha? They can ban people if their brother sneaks onto their account?

[Rob]

Wait, wha? They can ban people if their brother sneaks onto their account?

If they've also been TO'ed 17 times in 10 months...


Then yes.

[Johnny-june]

I am assuming this has never happened to any of you...
The title says it all.


She was in a car with one of her friends and they got into an accident. The weren't drunk, high, or in any way under any influence.



I don't know what to do with anything anymore.
No matter which way I look at it I can't help to think it was my fault.

I spent the past 7 hours sitting outside of her house on some rock, no tears at all. I have no fucking idea.

All I can muster to say intelligibly would be to cherish every moment of it, because no matter how certain you are shit like this won't happen to you... It could.

Maybe you could visit her grave or do something about it instead of opening up to a bunch of strangers. She was your girlfriend for fucks sake.
Asshole...

[Vir]

Maybe you could visit her grave or do something about it instead of opening up to a bunch of strangers. She was your girlfriend for fucks sake.
Asshole...

You really need to read the thread and not just the OP.

[BreakTheWalls]

If they've also been TO'ed 17 times in 10 months...


Then yes.

The straw that broke the camel's back. Thanks for making that remarkably clear for me.

Also, didn't the thread earlier say "My Girlfriend Died"? Now it's "I killed my girlfriend." oh ho, SealPunter's brother, you truly amaze me.

[Raxo]

So no pictures huh?

[Johnny-june]

Oh shit he doesn't have a girlfriend, I didn't read that post.
Wait, my loser alert is raising,raising,RAISING!,RAISING![SIZE="7"][SIZE="7"]RAISING!


OH MY GO- KA-BOOM



Oh my god sorry couldn't contain myself.

[HappyPalooza]

Sweet. I wonder what else I can get Rob to do.

[Haggis McSpud]

Ha ha, who changed the name of this thread?

[BreakTheWalls]

Like lock this thread?

[Rob]

Like lock this thread?

Not just yet. The post-permaban threadshit parade has been an Explosm custom for as long as I can remember.

[Johnny-june]

Ha ha, who changed the name of this thread?

I did, I mean look at my avatar it fucking says it all.

[Johnny-june]

Not just yet. The post-permaban threadshit parade has been an Explosm custom for as long as I can remember.

That's why Explosm is wonderfull. You should let him see this, and let him give a last post.
Imagine how would it be... (look at my avatar again and you know what.)
Like complete "I dont need u fuckers and i r do shitz agaiaiain lolollollolo".

[Raxo]

Not just yet. The post-permaban threadshit parade has been an Explosm custom for as long as I can remember.

I like a man who respects tradition

[Dodger]

I say it all
/
http://forums.explosm.net/image2.php?u=32532&dateline=1224616474

[Johnny-june]

I say it all
/
http://forums.explosm.net/image2.php?u=32532&dateline=1224616474

It lives!!!

[Haggis McSpud]

So has anyone else here got a (preferably non - existent) dead girlfriend or boyfriend they'd like to talk about before this thread gets dumped?

[MistyTehMoose]

my boyfriend died n shit i would also like attn plz

[MistyTehMoose]

:(

[Johnny-june]

Umm... I got one. It's called perverted smiley face. And I love him.
Nah... just kidding close the fuck out of this thread Rob :D

[Alcoholic]

i wuz upset by this joke 'cuz i had a gf n she died b4 i could break up w/ her
fukn bitch

[Haggis McSpud]

You guys my boyfriend died of a horrible spine disease just after he run over my dog. =[ Can I have attention too please?

[javaD]

Well done for not reading the latest thread update:lol:

Yeah sorry...I'm really lost this days! I think they put something in my food, but your such an ass for lying about your dead girlfriend!...or lack of.

[meTalmessiah]

My little brother just killed my girlfriend with my Explosm account!

sympathy plz

[Alcoholic]

My little brother just killed my girlfriend with my Explosm account!

sympathy plz

IS SPLOSM GONNA GET BANNED FOR BEING A WEAPON?!?

[Johnny-june]

Im afraid so.

[abbey]

Oh shit he doesn't have a girlfriend, I didn't read that post.
Wait, my loser alert is raising,raising,RAISING!,RAISING![SIZE="7"][SIZE="7"]RAISING!


OH MY GO- KA-BOOM



Oh my god sorry couldn't contain myself.
god i fucking hate you

[Mr. Crow]

If they've also been TO'ed 17 times in 10 months...


Then yes.

That's almost twice a month! The fiend.

[Intestiny Destiny]

I feel sad everytime somebody gets banned.

[Pelican Man]

Well, fine whatever.

But you were still wrong, sadochism implies that he was inflicting the pain on others.

SO FUCK YOU.

You said yourself that this thread had nothing going on in it. It's mere existence is causing the forums pain.

[CasinoCloudz]

My foot is starting to hurt.

[Christoffason]

Hmm, I called this in the first few posts. What a mess. As soon as Johnny-june started posting the whole thread just went downhill fast.

Oh well, I do enjoy a bit of scandal, I was worried Explosm was becoming a soul healing site. If it did, I'd post Goatse.

[CalculatePie314]

Who goes on their brothers account to make a thread about his girlfriends death?

[Rob]

Who goes on their brothers account to make a thread about his girlfriends death?

It was not his brother. It was SealPunter because he is a jackass.

[CalculatePie314]

And he blamed his "brother"?

Haha, what an idiot.

[Pelican Man]

Oh well, I do enjoy a bit of scandal, I was worried Explosm was becoming a soul healing site. If it did, I'd post Goatse.

Oh man, can we please turn Explosm into a soul healing site? It can be my Christmas present.

[TheHighwaySong]

First he makes up a girlfriend, and now he's making up a brother. :rolleyes:

[Tyler_Legrand]

People I knew died during my lifetime and I've never made threads about them

Do you think I should next time?

[FuriousPineapple]

My brother killed my girlfriend last week and this thread offends me.

[Homemaster]

I never really liked him much...

[Derelict]

So what exactly...

EDIT: If this thread is fake I hope Sealpunter burns in hell.

[spaj]

I died

[Shmuh]

So, now you're not there,
But your ghost still burns in the air.
And finally above us the waves have come,
To take you away.

And with this song, I'll say good bye,
And thank you for what you've done to my life.
And finally, I'll say it with love.
I hope you rest, in the stars above.
And I don't understand what you died for.
We still could have given so much more.
Even though you were something I could never be.
I know you're still there watching over me.

Now (x5)

[Ziggy St. Valentine]

The blade of my knife
Faced away from your heart
Those last few nights
It turned and sliced you apart
This love that I tell
Now feels lonely as hell
From this padded prison cell

So many times I said
You'd only be mine
I gave my blood and my tears
And loved you cyanide
When you took my lips
I took your breath
Sometimes love's better off dead

You're all I need, make you only mine
I loved you so I set you free
I had to take your life
You're all I need, you're all I need
And I loved you but you didn't love me Laid out cold
Now we're both alone
But killing you helped me keep you home
I guess it was bad
Cause love can be sad
But we finally made the news

Tied up smiling
I thought you were happy
Never opened your eyes
I thought you were napping
I got so much to learn
About love in this world
But we finally made the news

You're all I need, make you only mine

[Matterialize]

17 times

This is like the third person who's been permabanned after exactly 17 timeouts.

[Riddlebox]

I'm sure she really did die. Only a complete ass would make a thread about a false death just so they could get attention.


Yeah, like what if some asshole posted a fake story about having a long struggle with cancer, and pretended to be their parent posting on an internet forum to let everyone know he had died.

[BKS]

Yeah, like what if some asshole posted a fake story about having a long struggle with cancer, and pretended to be their parent posting on an internet forum to let everyone know he had died.

Badankle isn't Fabz's parent, is he?

[Tyler_Legrand]

You're not old enough to understand, BKS.

[Ziggy St. Valentine]

I licked my girlfriend.

[LaPhBu]

I licked my girlfriend.

And then she got into a car accident, I can't help but think that the licking caused the accident. But I'm not crying, no crying is for babbys. So instead I will sit on a rock. hard cock :hmm:

[Crabstick]

I feel sad everytime somebody gets banned.

Is that kinda like the way you feel sad for accidentally running over a squirrel?

Like you're sad because it happened but when you think about it you realise you didn't really care for them before it happened, so why should you know?

[Infinity]

I licked my girlfriend.Sorry about the sweet and salty aftertaste I left for you. I dont like wearing condoms.

[1zabest]

Sorry about the sweet and salty aftertaste I left for you. I dont like wearing condoms.

hurrrrrrrrrr

[Riddlebox]

Badankle isn't Fabz's parent, is he?

No, Fammo did that, and we all bought it.

It was funny though so we forgave him <3

[The Fetus]

People do that on explosm all the time. I mean, it's a place where a lot of creative people come to toss out bits of their skill to a sounding board of like minded people and/or act like jackasses and/or have an uncanny ability to laugh at the most inappropriate things, a.k.a. the entire collection of C&H (also, this very thread).

This isn't exactly the best community to look for sympathy. Not saying that this community *can't* express those feelings, but it's generally the opposite.

Dude, I know you're just being a dick. And I wasn't even looking for sympathy, I was looking for people with advice and similar stories.

I couldn't care less if you believe me or not. The only person who could know it's true is me. I just got angry when you tried to make me look like I was a liar. You could've just said you didn't believe me instead of trying to convince people that I was lying when I wasn't.

[BKS]

Oh.

I knew that Badankle really wasn't. I just associated the wrong old person.


Now I feel dumb.

Kinda LIKE THIS THEAD! Amirite?

[LaPhBu]

No. You aren't "rite"

jk ilu :shobon:

[1zabest]

So you don't think this thread is dumb?

[LaPhBu]

No. You aren't "rite"

jk ilu :shobon:


Now you can see the magical white text :indiff:

[1zabest]

I fail :(

[Souldrinker]

So has anyone else here got a (preferably non - existent) dead girlfriend or boyfriend they'd like to talk about before this thread gets dumped?


Well, many, many years back, I had just started seeing this chick. Ran into her one morning down the main road, had a chat and told her I'd call her later and hook up with her and those she was gonna go out with later.

Family shit got in the road, so I didn't even get a chance to call let alone go. Ended up being able to make my way to her place at about 11pm that night. A whole bunch of people were milling around the front yard, but whatever.

I go up to one, he looks like he's in some kind of daze. I ask him where she is, he realises who's talking to him, starts crying and blurts out that she was killed in a car accident that arvo. She was in the back of the panel van with another bloke and thus no seatbelts. The driver was driving like a douche or something, rolled the car and she was killed along with the other bloke in the back. The front passenger (her brother) was fucked up and in a coma and the driver was relatively fine.

Her brother died 3 days later.

True story, too, ladies and gentlemen.

[Vir]

That's exciting, probably a good thing I'm not allowed to drive anymore because I drive like that all the time, never flipped a car yet though, I'll work on it.

[BKS]

My friend's brother knows this guy who's girlfriend was eaten. Skin, meat, brains, all that was left was bones.

This never happened.

[LaPhBu]

My friend's brother knows this guy who's girlfriend was eaten. All that was left was a wilting boner.

This never happened.

Fix'd

[Riddlebox]

Fix'd

Why the apostrophe? You're not saving any time between "fixed" and "fix'd"

[LaPhBu]

Yeah the e is farther than the ' on the keyboard :mad:

[Lag]

Yeah the e is farther than the ' on the keyboard :mad:

The major grouping of the letters in 'fixed' consist of 4 of them being in direct vicinity of each other, with the 'i' being farthest away. The apostrophe is even farther away, and sacrificing one of the major grouped letters for an even farther letter, is just plain silly.
You're better off saying 'Fixt'

[Casalen]

My girlfriend killed me about a year ago. She was nice enough to reanimate me, though. First she replaced my missing body parts by working at a funeral home and taking the best organs she found, then she used some artificial blood substance to make me almost-live.

It was a really hard time for both of us. Well, for her at least. I didn't really notice, because I'm dead.

[Tyler_Legrand]

Why say can't when you can say can not?

Actually, use apostrophes for everything. Like this:

'ct'lly, use 'pstr'phes f'r 'v'ryth'ng.