Explosm Rap Battle Submission Thread

[Benjaman]

This thread is for the contestants listed below to submit their mad rapz to the Explosm judges (Me, Raxo, and InTransit), so that we may judge them as judges do. This is how judging will happen for the second round and onward:

I will pick who I think should win from each bracket, Raxo will pick his choices, and Tranny will do the same. Whoever has the most votes for each bracket will move on.

Now for submissions, I will link a series of rap beats, graciously provided by Exetra if he ever gets on MSN or expresses interest in making them, for the contestants to choose from. They will record themselves "dissing" their opponent in rap form to one of these beats. Each bracket has 4 (pending) days to submit their diss before being disqualified. The last one standing wins. I'd allow discussion in here, but we already have a properly titled thread RIGHT THERE (http://forums.explosm.net/showthread.php?t=52438) so if you want to post non-submissions there instead feel free.

Now, the first round is a bit different. You have an OPTION to skip this, it isn't mandatory. It's mainly to give me some time to get beats and contestants to experiment with ideas. Entries are encouraged, and the time limit is only until we're all ready. Okay?

CONTESTANTS:

CnGy
Dodger
BKS
Mustache
Exetra
Allen
Metalhead
Tweek

Yes, I understand that if we go to the second round with 8 people, someone will get past without rapping. Whatever/

[Dartful_Dawger]

K, so do we have to do a video or can it just be audio? I don't have a cam, but I do have a mic.

[Benjaman]

Nah, it can be either. Video would be funnier but it's not like it'll hurt you or guarantee you a win.

[Dartful_Dawger]

k

[BKS]

So... we're dissing who this round?

[Benjaman]

Nobody. You don't even have to submit anything, although if you want to practice or something until I'm ready then go for it.

[exetra]

Sorry I don't get on MSN much... Putting beats on mediafire at the moment.

Done! I've supplied five to choose from. (http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?wody020jjan) :rock:

[Benjaman]

Jesus exetra, didn't think it'd be that quick. I guess I'll send out some PMs and set up the brackets later today.

[Benjaman]

BRACKETZ

Tweek vs CnGy
BKS vs Mustache
Dodger vs Allen
Metalhead vs Exetra

You have 5 days. No contender has to go first, so just submit your diss to this thread before July 31st.

If you need recording software, use Audacity. Just google it because my internet is being slow right now and I can't link ya.

[Raxo]

http://audacity.sourceforge.net/

If you need Audacity.

[Dartful_Dawger]

Oh wow that was a fast first round.

[Metalhead636]

Metalhead vs Exetra

Hoooooo shit.



How many lines should the rap be?

[Benjaman]

Whatever you think is sufficient. One line would suck, although if it was too long, it wouldn't be interesting.

[Raxo]

Try to keep it around 16-20 lines not long or too short.

Not strict rules you can go over or have less.

[Benjaman]

EXTENDING UNTIL THE 3RD because nobody seems to want to do anything.


Sending out PMs now.

[BKS]

I'm already done with mine. BRING IT MUSTACHE
http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/v230/1825/90/n646940389_8772.jpg
http://agunslingerrots.tumblr.com/post/152720398/a-rap-i-had-to-make-dissing-my-opponent

There we go

Mustache is the name you go by
I don't know why
Take a look at this guy
He thinks he so fly

Fur on ya face and ya think ya cool
Everybodys laughing at the tool
Someone tell him its a disgrace
Get that that dirt stache off your face


Do it with a razor and some wax
Your raps are shit and thats the facts
Take a seat and just relax
Your raps wish they were colored black

What a disgrace for a namesake
You know that mine was a fake
Now you're embarassed and trying to hide
While I'm giving out free mustache rides


Bitch

[exetra]

Booyah. Lyrics below: (http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?mm2iw53e1xm)


Metalhead? Metal's dead and it always has been
Bitch you are a has been, you'll never see what I've seen
Bling, bitches, fat rims dope and ho's
'Cause all you got is greasy hair from your head to your toes
And it shows, you so uncultured you see white and white
You'd even lynch living colour cause you're so uptight
I'm upright, musical progress flows through my fingertips
Takin' tips, nothin' but truth rolls off of my lips
The truth hurts you standing there in your band shirt
You rhyming sound like you got a mouth full of dirt
Like the dirt on yo greasy face I come from an easy place
Now open your mind and find that music is more than bass
And guitars, double kicks, licks and shit
I ain't ever witnessed metal makin' someone a hit
So take my advice: pass the mic, you is haggard
You don't belong; move along you straight-up faggot.

[Mustache]

Average mic quality.. (http://www.mediafire.com/?tymkn1knmn2) :mmyes:

Before I bring the pain, I've got just one thing to say
I'm the prim and proper rapper and I might be little bit gay

I keep the swears to a minimal
I'm an animal, but not a criminal
...I drink lots of minerals

But that's enough about me, how about you?
I hear your voice is so deep it'll make my bowels move
Scientifically speaking, that's pretty darn deep
I saw that once on Mythbusters and they couldn't compete
But now it's time to secrete
Not stool, but rhymes and rhythms
I'm not even on beat
But I'm sending you to prison


I'm the prim and proper rapper


This kid's got nothing in his sack, it needs to be filled
So call up the senate and pass him a bill
I bet he'll be excited 'cause he's living a lie
He's a dog gone girl trying to be a guy

Put the bill in a frame in independence hall
Have the title read "need 'em"
And the passage read "balls"

Oh shit, this rap hasn't been very proper
It seems my fancy was tickled and i pulled out the stopper
Now i'm all in a frenzy and it's all because of you
But nothing could be better cause this is my debut

I'm the prim and proper rapper

Lookit how long it is! :yes:

[Dartful_Dawger]

Mustache's was fucking amazing.
Shit was awesome.

[Benjaman]

Kay, extending a little bit. Until the 5th. LAST EXTENSION I SWEAR

[Jeftris]

Another extension? It's the 6th now and still there's only been like 3 people submitting raps.

[Benjaman]

Okay, I'm not going to EXTEND, per se, but I'll talk to Dodger and Allen and etc and see if they're actually still interested. IF they say no we'll move on, If they say yes I'll wait.

[Mustache]

Move on with three people? That will make things sort of boring, especially if there any more drop outs.

[Benjaman]

Dodger said he can do his tonight, and Allen pretty much dropped out. I can either take whoever submits something, or do a coin toss in the brackets where nobody submitted. I'll decide tonight.

[Metalhead636]

You should wait 4 more days, when my new mic comes in the mail.

[Benjaman]

If by four days you mean 4 hours, sure.

[Raxo]

Indefinite extension! just kidding but

I would rather see something submitted than eliminate because people are lazy

[Dartful_Dawger]

guys, I'm sorry for being so late. But a bunch of unexpected and unplanned shit happened to me this week, so I really just haven't had the opportunity to record as planned. I'll do it now though.

so you know I'm not shitting you guys here are my lyrics that I'll beautifully rap for you in a few minutes.


http://www.mediafire.com/?wzobbbgwvtl

First rounds up and you put me against Allen?
Come on man be serious give me a real challenge
He's almost as ridiculous as his mom is promiscuous
I guess you're born to be a failure when you're not sure who your daddy is.
A reclusive retard, a regular Boo Radley, kids
I wouldn't be suprised if you were actually an accident
the horrible outcome of one drunken act of sin
noone could really want you, you were an accident, you would've had to have been
But no one can really blame you
it's not your fault an aborted fetus has more potential than you
a failure, an asshole, and probably a liar too
A burden to society is probably the highest you can aspire to
So I'mma end this shit now, because this rap was a bit rushed
and I apologize profusely for having you guys wait for us
But, you see, Allen is just a tad bit slow
Write? the bitch barely knows how the alphabet goes

[Benjaman]

TWEEK'S SUBMISSION

http://www.mediafire.com/?ixb8y0x9bu4

let me tell you a story about crimson glory

some say hes mental
his theories transcendental
illin in ill illinois
in trailer thats a rental
lacking way parental
nothing in the dental
smoking weed and weedy smoke
for years in count of twent-le

drug then hes got it
to eat or smoke or blot it

he philosophises
about demises

aint got a girl
hes a self inflicted virgin
he'll later dip the dippy lips
than become a surgeon

now its true that hes fly
but only when hes high
and that is the way of the cngy

he'll be so fucked right now i wont get a reply

And, oh, what the hell, we're doing this for fun so I'll wait for Metalhead and CnGy, and Allen if he gets better.

[SourChicken]

If someone drops I could jump in, if it's super duper necessary

[Jeftris]

Yeah I'm up for that aswell, if anyone else drops out I'd be happy to join in.

[Mustache]

Jeft vs. SourC. Problem solved for everyone.

[Benjaman]

Yeah, sure. Jeftris vs SoChi, do it whenever sometime soon.

[Jeftris]

If Ben and Sourchicken are OK with that then that'd be awsome. The only issue is that my voice is horrificly breaking and i've got a shitty mic, but I can get around it.

[Jeftris]

SORRY DOUBLE POST.
But i've done my rap, please excuse my bad quality mic, lyrics, gay ass high voice and everything else, 'cause this was made in like two hours.

Link. (http://www.mediafire.com/?rmzhz1unjrz)

Sourchicken, what the fuck,
you challenge me, you fucking suck.
don't even bother tryin',
'cause you'll only go home cryin'.
fortunatly for me my raps are the shit,
but unfortunatly for you, yours just arent legit.
the legitamate legitamacy of your raps,
is a bigger joke than Bill Gates wearing fucking flat caps.
what the fucks the deal with the name SC?
I think it's pretty gay, i'm sure youd agree.
I understand that these lyrics arent the best,
but damn son seriously just give it a rest.
cause if you somehow manage to fluke and win,
you can suck all long and day on my fucking foreskin.

Plus it's very short.

[SourChicken]

My rap is a bit longer, I'll widdle it down if I can.
And I sorry to delay it more, but I can't record today (fingers crossed for tomorrow)

By the way, I pretended your name was Jeff:
This goes out to little boy Jeff
His rhymes are so shrill they're slowly makin me deaf
But I don't need to tell you things that you already know
Like that my nose is so big that I can smell when it snows
How about some shit you ain't never heard
How bout a secret that I gathered from a little bird
Well listen up kids sit up straight like a nerd
Because on Jeftris, y'all about to get learned

His first time with a a girl was on his mother's bed
"Good or bad" he couldn't decide so he was undecided
Don't fret he got it up eventually
Did I forget to tell you the girl's name was Freddy?
His lyrics are so weak they couldn't open a door
My rhymes ain't that way, you gonna sway back and forth
They make you hit the floor
They leave you beggin for more
Of me
Can't you see
My big fat mole?
Hey Jeftris
You're an asshole

[Jeftris]

My name is Jeff :lol:

[SourChicken]

Then my plan worked perfectly...

Ha your last couple lines made me giggle

[Dartful_Dawger]

K so are you guys judging now?

[Raxo]

Only one battle is complete but I have given several listens to what has been listed and made my decision on that one complete battle.

Bold haven't submitted anything

Tweek vs CnGy
BKS vs Mustache
Dodger vs Allen
Metalhead vs Exetra
Sochi vs. Jeftris

I don't even know if Tranny knows about this.

[Mustache]

What's your decision? I'm so nervous

[Tweek]

If you need to even up numbers or anything for next round I won't mind being kicked out, I only submitted something because I didn't want to fuck it up for anybody else.

[SourChicken]

I think that this is less of a competition and more of a fun forum game.

[SourChicken]

Woo double post

http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?yozz5wyeeji

[CnGy]

i was at lollapalooza you dick fucks

i may submit, may not

it was my idea so i think i should be like THE BOSS OF WHETHER OR NOT I GO

yea

[Tweek]

Such an angry young man

[Benjaman]

Yeah, go for it CnGy.

[Jeftris]

Shit SC's was really shit. So far two battles have been completed.

[SourChicken]

Shit SC's was really good. So far two battles have been completed.

Oh, stop

[Mustache]

Yeah seriously. You just made a rap making fun of him, man. That's like going back on your word.

[Jeftris]

Yeah seriously. You just made a rap making fun of him, man. That's like going back on your word.
Shit SC's was really shit. So far two battles have been completed.

I said it was shit dude, what the hell.

[BKS]

He omitted "the"

[SourChicken]

What the fuck is going on

[Mustache]

Wait a second..

[Dartful_Dawger]

Second round time?

[Benjaman]

Well, I don't want to be too strict about this cause hearing rap entries, whether they're better than their opponents or not, is hilarious. I'll judge as they go, then, as Raxo has modeled.

MY VOTES SO FAR (bold):

Tweek vs CnGy
BKS vs Mustache (Mustache actually almost won it here, I was really surprised at his rap, I honestly thought it was going to suck. Sorry.
Dodger vs Allen
Metalhead vs Exetra
Sochi vs. Jeftris

oh I posted this is submissions whatever.

[Raxo]

Bold gets vote

Tweek vs. CnGY - Fuck you CnGy for creating this and not participating.
BKS vs. Mustache - Mustache's entry was spectacular.
Dodger vs. Allen
Metalhead vs. Exetra
Sourchicken vs. Jeftris - Hard to choose but Sochi was funnier.

Good job on all your submission. All in all some pretty funny shit.

Edit: Only the BKS vs. Mustache match needs deciding :O

[CnGy]

if i'm going to make a rap it will be my own rap video that I will share with you if I feel like it. I am not your fucking monkey.

i wanted to be a judge

[Raxo]

SoChi reply rap to jeftris just for kicks

I guess I can still participate if I can send messages.

Here's a response rap I did for fun


Well
You got one thing right I must say
Your rhymes are tight like Madonna and I'm also kinda gay
If you were LEave it to Beaver, I'd be Good Times
You are Al Qaeda and I'm DY NO MITE
You should get your words straight concentrate alleviate de-populate
Just go and masturbate
Your rhymes ain't the best that's fo sho
Motherfucker said legitimate three times in a row
That's a nice accnet and your voice can go higher
I'd try to impersonate but I"m not from the Shire
"Protect the One Ring?" Those movies were bad
Personal inquiry: Was Bilbo your dad?
You're a funny kid, you're English and probably lankey
But I'm a funky ass Jew and proud to be a Yankee
I am the Knight Rider like David Hasselhoff
I'd make you suck on my foreskin but a moyle cut it off


http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?edkozwhznnd

Pretty funny stuff in my opinion.

[BKS]

Vote for me and I'll suck your dick.

[Mustache]

Haha, SoChi's was pretty funny.

Vote for me and I'll let you watch me get my dick sucked :gj:

[Benjaman]

DOESN'T MATTER; THIS IS WHAT I'M DOING

7 people submitted, so all 7 of you go through. Dodger, Tweek, SoChi, BKS, Mustache, Jeftris and Exetra will have a tournament, with 1 person going through automatically because of numbers. Fair, right? I'm going to post the brackets in a sec, so judging for the previous round wont count.


http://i27.tinypic.com/jr8e3o.jpg

That's the bracket, so you know who you're dissing now. You have until Saturday, but as far as a deadline goes it's not too solid.

[BKS]

Jeftris, summarize yourself in 4 words.

[Mustache]

I know everything about you already exetra. Don't even worry about it.

[Dartful_Dawger]

Who's tweek?
by the way, I have college orientation friday, and moving in saturday. So if mine isn't up by tomorrow, chances are I'll miss that deadline. Just saying.

[Benjaman]

I hate you guys. Extending until Friday of next week. Going to send out PMs sometime.

Aaaand, fuck you again. 3rd is the new deadline.

[Jeftris]

SORRY I WAS ON HOLIDAY.
Will get up rap asap.

[exetra]

http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?onzmkyjej4t

What the fuck do you think you're playing at son?
Fuck, it's not even November...

I was talking to a wise old man one day
He said "son, listen carefully to what I say"
He spoke words of wisdom and if I'd have missed them
I'd still be a kid with a mo getting pissed on
He took me under his wing and gave me tutoring
Shaved my face every day, it was that or neutering
I learned about cats who think they're hard as shit
Acting tough cause they got a muff on their upper lips
So who the fuck do you think you are, Stachio?
I'll pick you up, open you up like a pistachio
I've got more than enough nuts to take you
Pull a Gillette Mach 3 and fucking break you
Take two: Look at you, faggot with handlebars
That shit's for face fucking but I won't leave many scars
Fatality: I don't give a fuck what the man says
I'll grab a wad of brown and give you a dirty sanchez

[Benjaman]

Oh by the way extending until the 12th because I want this contest to live, dammit.

Also, thanks for actually submitting exetra :3

[exetra]

Fuck I thought I edited it with the link in :S

http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?onzmkyjej4t it disappeared apparently.

Or maybe not. Guest vocal by Ercoledi :smug:

[Mustache]

Fuck you exetra. I don't really have any more wittiness. I'll try I guess..

[exetra]

If noone posts shit today you're all gay and I win everything forever

[Mustache]

ok

[Raxo]

Goddammit guys post something

I don't want this to die :mad: